guys, this week Tuesday and honestly part of Wednesday were those days where your nerves are fried. Where instead of feeling like you're making any progress in things like laundry, cleaning, parenting, or honestly even feeding your family, you are moving backwards at warp speed. How can it be possible to move backwards in feeding people?! We finish a meal no one likes and they ask for snacks- for real. The kitchen is still a war zone from cooking and they are asking for snacks? I can't handle this nonsense and it started to really really get to me.
For those that don't know I'm a homeschooling stay at home mom with 4 boys. we have a 5th, 3rd, 1st and a 3 year old who is into tantrums and screaming. Also he likes to find markers and use his hands like paper. I'm doing my absolute best raising this crew- but somedays, like this week, it's just a LOT overwhelming. Add to that (confession) a certain celebrity giraffe kept me up too late one night, (anyone else feel like this is the longest pregnancy ever- like even longer than my own 4?!) and my coffee wasn't quite making me bright eyed.
The kids were bickering
I was grumpy
School was both hard to teach and hard for them to learn
the house was a mess
I was on edge
the giraffe was still expecting. (this feels good to admit) lol
It was the perfect recipe for me to give myself the big old green light to feel sorry for myself. Like full blown pity party style. For me, once that green light is given, chocolate is consumed, dishes sit unwashed, and the woe is me mentality takes root. I am not proud of this. This isn't a brag post, this is me being real. Why does having a bad day make me feel like my whole life is a mess? I think Satan is such a pro at that... I think there is a spiritual battle waging with such intensity that we don't even recognize. and sometimes giving myself the "green light" is really just as excuse to sin... and I need to recognize that too.
His lies to me:
kids are fighting = I am failing at being a mom
the house is messy = I can't juggle all of this like other people can
a giraffe hasn't had a baby on facebook live = it EFFECTS me
A tantrum = I can't handle this anymore
Once lies are recognized, they can start being replaced with truth... and truth is freeing! So kids are fighting, I need to deal. They can go outside and get out some of this energy in a healthy way. they can do chores, they can lose a privilege, they can be assigned to help clean up this mess around here. I need to be ready with a plan. Then I need to follow thru. If they still fight, there can be things like early bedtime... and sometimes that's exactly what we all need.
The house is a mess- I can clean! and it'll still get messy again. Seriously, this one is just something I need to come to some kind of reality check with. Our house is in use 24/7. Because 5 people are HOME living, schooling, eating, projecting, playing, watching giraffes all day everyday it's an ongoing thing to pick-up, sweep-up, laundry-up. It's just the season we're in. I need to set my mind on other things and not get depressed with the constant state of mess.
a giraffe. ok, this one is hard. Come on April!!! You have the whole world on edge!!!
a 3 year olds' tantrum. Again, I need to have a plan... and it still won't always follow the script... because life is like that. life is as messy as a 3 year old with markers.
Bottom line, bad days don't equal a bad life. They don't make me a bad mom. I need to step back, get a big picture focus again and remember that God is working on each of these hearts... mine included!
This verse soothes my soul at least as much as chocolate does, Hope you find some hope in it too
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