Homeschool kick off year 8!

Someone asked me how I can be a supporter of both homeschool and public school... I've been thinking about it this week. A few conclusions: I have confidence in our decision for this season of raising kids, I know we are doing what works for us. Therefore I'm not living for your approval; I'm not doing this to impress or gain status. I've got nothing to prove other than we're choosing this (because it's our choice to make) and aren't worried what other people think whether good or bad.  

BUT I also have confidence and support for your decisions, even and especially if they are different from mine! I support families, and raising kids IS NOT a competition. We can add richness and perspective to eachother's lives by encouraging and supporting, not in comparing. Each path holds its benefits and challenges. What a gift we can bring to relationships if we can learn to be a life giving source of support, encouragement and a different perspective. We can add new possibilities, enhearten through the challenges, and celebrate together the complete joys each path holds! You don't need my approval, but I'm wholeheartedly giving it.

🏫🚸🚌📚🏡

School on families, school on!!! Hope it's a great year no matter how you're doing it!!! And in the spirit at trying this NON COMPETITION raising kids, what's your FAVORITE part of the path you're choosing? Mine right now is having the privilege to teach a new concept and see their minds click as they catch on.  

Our identity layers, and Who is at our very core

My Identity

When asked who I am when first meeting someone, there are a few go-to answers you would hear from me.  "I'm a stay at home, homeschooling mom of 4 boys" Is my typical ice breaker answer.  I stay home. I teach. I have 4 boys.  Your answer would likely be different from mine-  (Shout out to any other sahms, who homeschool 4 boys- message me... girl we are soul sisters)  lol. Maybe you work and you'd tell me about your career. Maybe you are a student and I'd hear about your education you're pursuing. Maybe you're a grandmother and you'd show me pictures of your grands. You might share something you're passionate about- art, animals, fitness.  If you are trusting and I'm making you feel especially invited, after introductions you might share a challenge you're facing, a fear or even an especially hard circumstance you're going through.  We share these different layers, to different people, at different times. Our roles. Our responsibilities, commitments, schedules. Hopefully we share struggles and prayer requests, ways we're being convicted, and growing as well.  It's this layer of vulnerability that I'm really passionate about this year.  As a New Year unfolded, I made it my intentional focus to find joy in the daily- the mundane real-life.  And to be transparent about ways I need prayer- ways I'm struggling to grow in my faith. Things God has really broken my heart over, and areas I'm experiencing HIS victory in.  

Identity is very layered, and each layer is unique for each person you cross paths with. We might share a layer of motherhood, but differ in # of kiddos, ages, gender. We might both be married, but differ in hobbies or passions.  We might both have a love for camping, or hiking. However, at our very very very core, as Women of Christ, we get to the deepest sense of "who we are". We are Redeemed. Daughters of The Most High King. We have been ransomed at the ultimate price and given a free gift that would have never been earned, bought or awarded. An undeserved gift of eternal life... forgiveness of sins.  This is what (WHO) truly defines me, and starts effecting all other layers of my identity.  I shouldn't try to find fulfillment in other roles, or responsibilities, but this is a constant internal war. In all honesty, one that I often times lose.  If I'm basing my identity on my kids, they become an idol to me... With good intentions of taking this mom gig seriously, I unintentionally bump their status up a bit too high and pretty soon my whole existence is orbiting around them. Life is good if they are "behaving", if they are obeying or happy. I'm learning that this is a sin struggle for me. My fulfillment comes from a relationship with Christ.  My identity isn't a wife, or a mom, although both are very important relationships that have shaped me and been life changing. My CORE identity and what needs to remain as FIRST place in my life is Jesus Himself. He brings fulfillment to my other roles, to the gifts He has given to me. He pours strength into my weaknesses, courage to keep going through a trial and His faithfulness in my life won't alter or shift. His GRACE is deeper than I can even grasp, and when He convicts me and then follows my repentance with such covering, cleansing grace!  So let me formally introduce myself,  

      "I am Stef, a saved sinner, Daughter of the King"

My prayer for you is that if you are born again, you will truly seek to find your identity in Jesus.  If you don't know what all of this means, or these are some new concepts for you- my prayer is that you will seek and find. The book of John is an excellent starting place, reading the life, ministry, death and resurrection of Jesus Himself... meeting Who He is and how it effects you and your eternity.  

Christmas Writing Prompt

It's Friday, that means in our homeschool we try to do something extra fun for writing. Today we played this Christmas roll a dice story prompt game.  The boys helped me pick characters, settings and problems... We wrote them all down and then took turns rolling the dice (I know it's technically "die" but come on now... let's just be real here)  Once they had their list, they got creative and set in writing.  Gavin ended up with a 4 page story complete with chaos in the toy shop and elves accidentally being delivered to a house instead of gifts.  Ryder's Santa was attacked by Jack Frost mid-air, action packed. Ledger, who isn't writing yet but can dictate and draw illustrations, included a mutant Mrs. Claus and Santa's sleigh breaking to pieces. I especially liked this activity because all ages could join in the fun at their own levels. 

It's always cool to just let them go- and see their creative personalities come out.

Oh, and also, who knew Rudolph isn't spelled with an f... We all learned something today, lol. 

Happy Friday friends!

Besties vs. Worsties

Fighting

Bickering

Tattling

Name Calling

Rough Housing

Annoying!!

I am up to my eyebrows raising 3 little boys... It is unbelievable to me the fights that break out over a toy,  or a block, or a stick!  (or anything!)  They are crazy competitive, at eachother's throats and have the ability to make me feel like I am totally losing my mind.  The messes they make, the disaster that goes in their wake is unreal.  They battle tempers, raw and wild emotions, jealousy, anger & selfishness.  The things that SCREAM out to me, demand discipline, beg for prayer and take up a lot of our time together.

And then there are the quiet moments

The moments that could easily slip by as I breath a sigh of relief or just try to regroup.  Moments where they are sitting together at the table drawing their favorite superheros.  Moments where they are laying side by side on their bellies looking at the new search and find book from the library.  Moments when they are eachother's greatest defender, protector, best friend.  These type of moments do not scream for attention, or demand me to even notice them... in fact, they are much the opposite.  These moments threaten to slip by unnoticed in all the hecticness of daily life.  These moments must be intentionally sought out- and then I have the choice to let these moments soak deep into my very being.  Seeing glimpses of their true character starting to shine through all the negative bits and pieces that are tempting them at every turn gives me hope.

The fight that doesn't take place because my 7 year old chooses to put his little brother before himself.  The name that isn't called because my hot tempered 5 year old is actively being changed by a Savior that loves him and called him by name!  The bickering that is nipped in the bud because even my 3 year old is learning, little by little, how to be a friend.  These moments are silent and filled to the brim with peace-  these moments are the ones that are SO easy to miss if my only focus is on the fight that took place an hour ago.  The sweet times with these little boys can fade into the shadows if I allow the tattling from the past to hold my attention. 

My goal this year is to notice the moments that would otherwise go unnoticed.  And to uplift these guys in prayer for all the areas that are still a challenge.  I want my perspective to be one with eternal value-  and I want to take the time to notice prayers being answered each time the quiet moments surface.  God began a work in each of their individual lives the very moment they chose to accept Him as their Savior- and I am going to claim the promise that the Word gives: 

What little moments in your life are going by unnoticed today?  

School Year 2012

We homeschool.

I know- a lot of stereotypes probably come to mind as soon as the word "homeschool" is said.  We honestly, probably fit into a lot of those preconceived opinions.  Some, but not all of them.  

Our heart:
We have chosen to homeschool for a few different reasons- the main one being our faith.  I do not see public school as bad, or evil.  In fact- We are very blessed to live in an excellent school district and look forward to when our boys are a bit older and we will plug them into a school that we trust with teachers I not only respect, but who I know have a true heart for the kids they are teaching.  I know my boys will be in caring, loving and well trained hands.  For now though, while they are still in the early years- we feel led to keep them home and teach them not only academics, but also help them grow their own faith and lay a foundation that has roots straight to eternity.  I love being their teacher- it is an inspiration to teach them and watch their eyes light up as they catch onto a new concept.  To be here to see how proud they are when they get words on their spelling quiz right, or to watch them work hard on a project.  I am not quite ready to share the joy of teaching my boys with someone else! 

It isn't always easy, in fact with boys ages 6, 4 and 2 the days can be quite a challenge.  That doesn't discourage me (most days) or make me question our decision to keep them home for now.  A lot of jobs are hard- and a lot of jobs come with challenges a mile long.  I am relying on Christ to give me the strength for the extra hard days, and resting in His grace.  I know that having them home has given us, as a family, endless opportunities to instill a faith that is authentic, applicable to daily life and more valuable than anything else.  Opportunities that may have otherwise been missed.  

I do not feel that every family under the sun should homeschool their kids in order to instill a foundation of faith.  I also do not feel that parents who choose public school are bad, or are neglecting their responsibilities.  I do, however, feel very confident in the fact that for the season of life God has us right now- He is blessing our efforts to homeschool.  I know that by having the boys here- it is growing all of us to rely more deeply on Him, and it is a step of faith to obey what we feel He has asked us to do, knowing that all too soon this season will come to an end and I will be waving goodbye through the school bus window.  I know that He will also be there when we transition to the next phase- and that He will bless our years with public school kiddos too!  

My boys are gifted to my husband and I and we feel blessed to be raising them.  Our prayer is that they will grow up knowing a Savior that will never leave them, that they will learn the power of prayer.  That from an early age they will begin a daily walk with their Lord and become men of courage, integrity, compassion and love.  For the years I have them home, my prayer is that they won't just learn how to read, how to correctly do math and the different parts of sentence structure.  I pray that they will learn about the God who made them, loves them, and has a purpose for their lives that will far out pass any other path they may choose to take.  That they will begin the process of learning how to walk with Christ in a way that effects every moment of their day- not just their eternal destination.  

We are diving into a new school year- with a sense of peace knowing that the time we are investing in these 3 little souls is a very worthwhile investment.  That my job as their mom is one I do not take lightly, and one that gives me great joy!  Weather you are homeschooling, private schooling or public schooling- may this school year be one that matters in the life of your child!  Keep praying for their days- and that they will choose to walk with God wherever they are.  

How to salvage an otherwise bad day

I found this journal entry from awhile back- a time when parenting was very challenging for me.  Where homeschooling wasn't finding as easy place in the balance of being home with a 5, 3 and 1 year old. Since then, we have fallen into a better routine, where the challenges are fewer than the joys and the majority of our days have a sense of peace.  Reading this reminded me that hard days come and go- and that they do not have to be the norm, or the definition of life at home.  

November 2011

I don’t know the exact odds of 4 people getting up on the wrong side of bed on the same morning- or how specifically one crummy mood rubs off on those around you.  All I know is that this morning we had a case of the grumps: to. the. max.  I am talking about whining, pouting, and acting like brats: and that was just me!  We tried to settle down and do school- and it was one breakdown after another.  Teaching and learning don’t happen easily when both the student and the teacher are in this type of mood.  I think it’s safe to say we all felt overwhelmed, burnt out and just not really “into it”  this morning.  I literally hid myself and had a good old cry then picked myself back up after some prayer and went to plan B.  Forcing us to continue in this manor wasn’t benefitting anyone- we had to change things up and salvage the rest of our day- it was after all, only 8:43 am!  I packed away the school books (an option we have as homeschoolers- we can make up our hours when learning will actually take place!) 

Hard work.  I mean, deep cleaning, de-cluttering, junk tossing kind of hard work.  We started in the boys’ room.  It was a mess.  It was overwhelming to even step foot in there, much less actually be in there playing, sleeping or even having a time-out!  With the garbage bag in hand we tackled the disaster zone.  As we worked, we teamed up!  We used our frustration to our advantage and put all of that energy to work.  The result, a sense of accomplishment, a fresh start.  A recovered bad day.  Instead of feeling sorry for ourselves (this is an easy rut to fall into)  We switched focus for awhile and re-grouped.

Were the remaining hours of our day perfect? Not in the least- but our goal isn’t perfection.  Perfect days are not realistic- so we don’t even set the expectation that high.  The rest of our day was enjoyable- we were able to be here and not just throw the entire day out the window… we had a refocused perspective. 

What do you do when your day is just off to a bad start? Do you throw in the towel and just suffer through, or do you have a plan in place or some tricks up your sleeve so that you are able to shift focus and make the most of a hard situation?  Sometimes for our family, bad days are just plain and simple bad days- what can we learn through the challenging times?  What can we do different next time to have better results?  We don’t have to let the bad days define us- or overwhelm us.  We find our true guidance straight from the Word of God- and this is a verse that sooths my soul on the days where life is tough. We aren’t promised a life free from trouble- but we can still claim the promise of peace!  We can take heart and rest assured that we are in good hands. 

 

 

John 16:33

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”